We've all had it when we were young. We all remember how terribly uncomfortable we felt when we were around that person. We felt like our world was complete, yet falling apart all at the same time. Their eyes were like shining beacons in the dark, yet we were afraid to look them in their eyes for fear they would see the feeling we harboured for them. Our hearts quickened when we see them and at the same time they make our hearts just want to stop. We find everything wrong with the way we're dressed (when they see us). It really is a blender of emotions.
We think that these feelings eventually leave when we reach our adulthood. We find it clumsy and embarrassing to continue to feel this way. Some of us, actually find this feeling to be a weakness. We think it to be very childish to even suggest its nurturing and growth. My question is why do we choose to oppress these feelings? Aren't these feelings the ones that poets and artists write about? Aren't these the feelings that last all our lives?
These feelings eventually develop into something more. These feelings are the foundation of what we will experience later as love. Maybe that's why so many relationships aren't so romantic. Maybe that's why so many relationships fizzle.
However, my entry is about the way we feel and not even think about telling that person how we feel. Recently, I've had these feelings (believe it or not). I know it's stupid, but I can't bring myself to say anything. Maybe it's for the best. I'd rather keep a friendship. However, the feelings have been there for quite some time. It's hard to rationalize with your heart. It's hard to control what we feel and who for.
Sounds silly, huh? Why would a grown man (whose almost 40) feel this way. No actions were taken to pursue anything with this person. I believe I hide it very well. As far as she knows, I'm just a funny goober. Again, maybe it's just for the best.
Some my question to you all is what would you do? I would like to hear some really thought out answers. It's easy to say yes or no. It's really easy to say a prefabricated answer. It's not easy to say what you really feel. It's one of the most difficult things to do.
I'm really interested to hear some of the responses. As for me, I will not say anything. Not because I'm afraid, but rather I respect this person so much. I don't want to risk damaging something really nice. It's just me. However... Well, let's just say I'm always open to the possibilities.
Well, I'm calling this one done. Everyone have fun! Keep safe and dream big!
2 comments:
This is kind of a selfish perspective you've placed yourself into. Do you not feel that your friendship is not strong enough to express your "real" and "true" feelings? "Respect" ranks up there next to other words like Honor, Courage, and Commitment. Respect has never torn down any walls, only strengthen the bonds that hold us together. Perhaps you might want to focus less on taking the proverbial cricket from one's hand thus what you feel would be to protect your feelings of respect for your friends and take a little lesson from the elders by giving what you're ultimatly trying to protect......respect. *You cannot recieve what you desire without giving what one deserves*
I really appreciate your response. I did take that advise.It was a total crash and burn, but I live greatful that I did do it.
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