Shutterbug for April 21,2009

Hey crazy cats! I had today off again. So, I decided to get some culture in my life. I got out my little camera and decided to snap some picture. Let me know what you guys think. If it works out well, I'll do a sister site dedicated to pictures. Let me know. Keep safe and dream big!

A Day Off

Hey crazy cats, today I took a day off of work. I wasn't sick. I just chose a day to get some stuff done. I actually got some much needed stuff accomplished. For instance, here in Florida, you have to renew your car registration in your birth month. Mine was two months overdue! I know. I know. I was really busy though. The funny thing about it is that here in Florida, the DMV is excellent! I swear I was going to wait at least an hour. Much to my surprise, I was done in TEN MINUTES! I nearly crapped my pants! It was the best experiences in my pitiful life.

Anywho, from there, I went to work to drop off an item for someone. I just love showing up to work on my day off and rub it in every one's face. God, I love being a douche bag! As everyone ran around like chickens with their butt holes sewn shut, I merrily strolled through. I know I'm going to pay when I show up to work..lol.

I'm glad I took today off because on occasions, I need a day or two to recharge my batteries. We all need moments to gather our thoughts and put our noses to the grindstone again. In my case, I really needed to get some stuff in order.

Another cool thing is that I start a really short call tomorrow. It's only two weeks long. That's pretty cool. I'm just chugging along to my graduation. I'll be so flipping glad when I'm done. This degree has taken alot out of me. But like the sick puppy I am, I'm already lining up to get into the next one. I got to keep busy I guess. Plus, it really isn't that bad.

Well, so there you go. You just wasted time reading about my day when you could've been doing something more constructive. It's your fault! Next time, go watch some paint dry. Anywho, take care of yourselves and and a great week. Keep safe and dream big!

No Sex in the City

Hey crazy cats! I'm trying to get back to blogging like I used to. All I ask is for everyone to b a little patient with me. My life has gotten really busy, but I will try to make an effort to post my thoughts as soon as they pass through my demented mind.

I would like to start out by saying that I'm actually trying to go out a little more than what I'm used to. I've been cooped up at home because of school. Plus, the summer is coming and I really need to go out more. I've been a really big outdoors person, until recently, and I wanted to keep it that way.

Anywho, as most of you know, I've been trying o be a good little boy, but failing miserably. I found out that the more I try to stay on the straight and narrow, the more I get pulled over to the "dark side". It's funny, trust me. I really do believe that God himself enjoys the stuff that happens in my life. Its not all bad, but it is funny.

For those of you keeping tabs, I am STILL single. You might say that this is an on running joke in my life. I don't mind it much. However, I would like someone to share my thoughts with. Then again, if I do share my thoughts, who is willing to stick around after. Like I've said before, I'm simplistically complicated. To know me is to give up linear thought. I can hold my own in a conversation bout the whole changing geopolitical structure of the whole world. Yet, forget something important that I have to do. I love having debatable conversations.

There are a couple of possible interests on the horizon. I really enjoy meeting new people. I am rooting for one in particular, but only time will tell. I'll try my best. I'm not an easy person to deal with, but I am super easy-going.

Since being tossed into the dating scene ( like a puppy in a sack being tossed over a bridge and into a river), I've discovered how much it has changed. Now I see why many people opt for a career in Buddhist Monk! It's really hard out there. You no longer deal with the trying to impress them with your G.I. Joe collection. It's no longer about knowing all the lyrics to a Stevie B song. Who cares if you ran a thirty-yard touchdown for coach in the fourth quarter. Some women are content if you have all your teeth and aren't on the sex offenders list.

It isn't getting any easier for all of us. I have it pretty bad. You see, I have no children, no alimony, or family. So women thnk I'm either just released from prison for killing off my entire family or gay(not that it's a bad thing *Seinfeld*). I live in a very clean house, I love taking pictures, and drive a Rav4. Just those three things alone throw up red flags on the gaydar. Alas, sorry guys (lol), I'm straight.

I'm not in a rush to get married again. Truth be told, I NEVER want to get married again. That's like shooting yourself in the head a second time after you couldn't quite kill yourself the first time. It will take a miracle woman to even make me think like that ever again.

Like I said, I met someone last week and she seems like a very cool person. I give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I don't judge on appearance or other silly things. I think she is very pretty and very smart. However, she will remain a secret until always. No one needs to pry that much into my Kool-Aid. Hopefully, the enthusiasm will be reciprocated.

Well folks, I'm gonna call this one done. It's early in the morning, as I type this blog entry. As a matter of fact. it's three a.m. All I ask is wish me luck and fun. I love life. I want the most out of it. Just remember to love on another and not to play with the shotgun in the house. You might break something. Keep safe and dream big!

You Can Run...But It's Not Worth It.

I know it's been awhile. Truth be told, I really didn't feel like blogging. I was feeling a little down. However, now I feel better. It wasn't that I didn't want to be found. Quite the opposite! I just needed a moment for myself.

I recently saw "The Broken". It's a great movie. It's a really good thriller. In it, the protagonist finds herself in a world that she thought she knew changing drastically around her. I found out how much I can relate to this movie.Things that we hold dear are shattered right before our eyes and people who once proclaimed their undying love becoming total strangers. I realized (about three years ago) that true love does not exist. If you truly fall in "love" with someone, you're just giving the person authorization to destroy your soul at a moments notice. One thing I did learn from my ordeal, some wounds run really deep. It is not to say that you can't heal. It's just that you don't heal the same.

"Love" can make you believe in things that aren't always true. It can make you feel sorry for things that you haven't even done. It can warp the past and make it painful. "Love" can drive to the point of ending it all. "Love" clouds the mind.

Another thing that popped in my head was what happens when you love someone and they don't love you back? What if that person just uses you for their own gain? Who is ultimately responsible for the hurt that we go through when our worlds are shattered because of some uncaring, ungrateful person?

From what I've seen, you can cry all you want, God isn't going to change anything. You can pray for the pain to stop. You can pray for revenge. You can pray for reconciliation. You can pray for death. You can pray to forget. It won't do you any good. The pain is there for a reason. Sometimes, we find out the reason. Sometimes, we will never see the reason why.

So, if love sucks so bad, why do we continue to let it grow in our hearts. It's an addiction no one wants to breaks! We all want to feel wanted and loved. It's the dumbest reason, but it's true. Someone once said that love will conquer all. Not so. Someone close to me once said love never fails. It does... and it leaves you for dead. You cannot trust anyone...not even your family.

However, you cannot run or hide from it. You can try to disappear, but it is in vain. Love is a disease we all want. For those of us left a hollow shell of our former selves, become strong. Karma is real! For those who have caused pain, the clock ticks the seconds away before thy day of reckoning. For those who still believe with all their hearts in love, God is truly in your hearts. An indomitable spirit is worthless if you don't fight with passion for something. You can be be a fighter; if you have no heart it's worthless. You can be a lover, but let's face it if you don't love they have a name for that. You can lie to yourself and make it seem like it's everybody else's fault. That only leaves you with that anger.

So my remedy to "love" and it shortfalls is this... Don't lie to yourself and love God and yourself. The world is a messed up place. No one here is worth the pain they put you through. "Love" does mean you're going to get hurt. Even Peter broke Jesus's heart. Keep safe and dream big!